Come out together as allies on National Coming Out Day

October 6, 2025 - Defence Stories

Estimated read time – 2:30

By: Giancarlo Cerquozzi, Defence Team Pride Advisory Organization National Civilian Co-Chair

October 11 is National Coming Out Day—a day to celebrate authenticity, recognize the courage of Two-Spirit, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, and other sexual- and gender-diverse (2SLGBTQI+) people, and reaffirm our shared responsibility to create safer spaces for everyone.

“Coming out”, as the act of publicly or privately sharing one’s sexual orientation and/or gender identity, can look different for everyone. For some, it isn’t a defining moment because they have always lived openly as their authentic selves. For others, it can be an empowering milestone in their journey. For many, however, it remains difficult and even dangerous, as 2SLGBTQI+ people too often face rejection, discrimination, and harassment. And let’s face it, coming out is rarely a single event but an ongoing journey that demands both courage and resilience. Many 2SLGBTQI+ people come out more than once: to themselves, to parents and siblings, to extended family, colleagues, friends, and beyond.

I know from personal experience how challenging coming out can be. I didn’t come out to my parents until my late twenties, only after finishing grad school and saving enough money to support myself. Coming out earlier could have meant being kicked out of my family’s home, and managing tuition, rent, and launching a new career all at once would have been financially impossible. My parents are good people, but their traditional upbringing in rural Italy made it hard for me to trust that coming out would be safe.

For many 2SLGBTQI+ people in Canada, precarious housing isn’t just a fear—it’s a reality. According to the Everyone Counts 2020–2022 survey, 13% of respondents experiencing homelessness identified as 2SLGBTQI+, despite only representing about 4% of the general population. Among reasons for housing loss, 12% cited conflict with a parent or guardian. These numbers underscore how vital safety and support are when it comes to living authentically.

That’s why National Coming Out Day is not only about 2SLGBTQI+ people. It is also about the role we all play in building environments where others feel safe, affirmed, and celebrated for who they are. No aspect of who we are, from our gender identity and expression to our sexual orientation or any other identity characteristic, should ever stand in the way of living a full and authentic life.

This year, I invite members of the Defence Team to come out as allies. You can:

• Take the Defence Team Positive Space course or that of the Canada School of Public Service to strengthen awareness of 2SLGBTQI+ realities.
• Use visible identifiers—such as the Positive Space logo in your email signature, a Pride flag at your workstation, or a Pride pin on your lanyard—to signal that you’re a safe and affirming colleague.
• Attend 2SLGBTQI+ events to show your support and make space for authenticity.
• Consult with Defence Team Advisory Groups to help ensure policies and programs are inclusive by design.

Coming out as an ally matters—not only for colleagues, but also for 2SLGBTQI+ youth and communities beyond the workplace. When we show up visibly and vocally, we help build a safer world where everyone can live authentically.

So, Defence Team…will you come out with me?

Related Links

• 2SLGBTQI+ Terminology
• Unity: Anti-stigma awareness campaign
• The Fruit Machine documentary (English with French subtitles) (accessible only on the National Defence network)
• Emerging from the Purge: Reviewing the State of the LGBTQI2S Inclusion in Canada’s Federal Workplaces
• Defence Team Pride Advisory Organization (DTPAO) (accessible only on the National Defence network)